Jealousy. I have touched on this topic before but feel an unsettling urge to dwell on it a little deeper. Recently, I have been jealous of someone at school, for reasons we can talk about later, but the point is: it turned me into a green-eyed monster!

I despise this feeling. Every bit of it. But I can’t help but envy her. As I analyze this emotion, there is one thing that becomes clear…

We live in the age of envy. Human beings have always felt what Aristotle defined in the fourth century BC as pain at the sight of another’s good fortune, stirred by “those who have what we ought to have”. It is true, I feel innately uncomfortable about this girl’s great accomplishments even though I don’t want to feel this way one bit.

However, I recently came across the Growth Mindset. When we have a growth mindset, we look at the success of others and ask: what would it take for me to attain something similar? How am I going to be able to achieve this too? What would I have to do or learn? We are enabled to think about what we truly want. As a result, we can actually end up using jealousy as a resource, and can always make a plan to get there. This person’s accomplishments have reminded me of the fact that every person is on their own path of growth and success, and made me look a little deeper into constructing my own aims and goals. I may not be a person who gets things right the first time. But over time, I know I try hard to get there.

While I don’t think there is an instant cure for jealousy, I do think we can accept that this disruptive emotion is normal. When we accept, jealousy can uncover areas of our lives that need attention and improvement. Lastly, we may not have everything we want in life. Most of us don’t. But we probably have at least some of what we want, and that should never be disparaged. It is our differences that make us unique after all!

– SaaniaSparkle 🧚🏻‍♀️

111 responses to “Jealousy is mental cancer”

  1. equipsblog Avatar
    equipsblog

    What an incredibly wise way to look at the Green-Eyed Monster. Most of us would be envious of what you have accomplished at your young age.

    Liked by 6 people

    1. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
      MD Mohinul islam

      Hmmm

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Ajay Avatar
    Ajay

    Wisest words I’ve ever read.

    Liked by 4 people

    1. incandescentproseblog Avatar
      incandescentproseblog

      Half Slytherin Snacke { Some snakes have a venomous bite.}
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      >the Cusp pf Magic – Mystery & Evalution; agonizing hurdles out of thin air.

      >differently.”

      “The soul holds me tight
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      dedication, not another death….
      Ravens’ claws of Harry Potter Think of it as a sort of mini dragon. nails were like birds’ claws.” Deuteronomy 12:23, which reads: “Only be sure that you do not eat the blood, for the blood is the life,
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      Owl’s&;echo in the middle of the night: maybe those outside crickets burning Peace- a kiss let be known (goodbye), Peace your janky memoir ” In Five Act’s ” lite or not; O these critiquing&;games we play together&;E- affecting&;your last breath; thy last & first break of dawn. differently.” The term “gaslighting” hails, autonomy, choice or ‘permission’ “The soul holds me tight;”. <

      Liked by 1 person

  3. dennismantin1 Avatar
    dennismantin1

    When I was young, I was very jealous and about 20 years ago I noticed that I wasn’t; so the natural inclination was to attach an age thing or maturity to this.
    My theories on this are ever evolving which is a clear indication ‘I don’t know.’
    However, I believe jealousy although human and natural can be overcome.
    I have noticed that people who have trouble sharing seem to have more of a tendency for jealousy, which also could be immaturity.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
      MD Mohinul islam

      Yes 💞💞

      Liked by 1 person

  4. utahan15 Avatar
    utahan15

    as you know, you are old enough to be aware of knee jerk, superficial reactions to things that may appear to be one way. but often if we dig deeper, we find we are often in error. a fine post. relax and learn. you re just getting started after all!

    Liked by 4 people

  5. taurusingemini Avatar
    taurusingemini

    The jealousy we feel, normally, suggests at how we feel, inadequate, it has, nothing, to do with the individual with what we may feel jealous about, it’s more on our own, insecurities…

    Liked by 4 people

    1. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
      MD Mohinul islam

      Right 👍👍👍

      Liked by 1 person

  6. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
    MD Mohinul islam

    Most important writing ! Thank you so much 💓💓💓 beautiful friend !

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Nathan Lawlor Avatar
    Nathan Lawlor

    Nice post! I think being aware of your own emotions can be quite powerful, and being able to take action is a great contribution to growing our mindset. I recently wrote a post about growing a new mindset, and this is a great example of how to.

    Liked by 5 people

  8. Joe Avatar
    Joe

    Very nice post. I too have become a green eyed monster especially way back in the day. They say that the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. I used to envious quite often until I began to realize why the grass was greener.

    More fertilizer, usually coming from bulls.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Ellias Jafari Avatar
      Ellias Jafari

      The monster got green eyes from eating too much greener grass lol

      Like

  9. MentalHealthBlogger Avatar
    MentalHealthBlogger

    Great post! I have often felt something akin to jealousy about my big sister. She did not get bipolar the way I did. She is very together, thoughtful and supportive in general as a sister and in particular regarding my bipolar illness. For several years she took me into her home during what I call mini-breaks. Rather than being jealous of her, I am encouraged to let her be a role model for me instead.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Jealousy is mental cancer – Tonya LaLonde Avatar
    Jealousy is mental cancer – Tonya LaLonde

    […] Jealousy is mental cancer […]

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Alethea Kehas Avatar
    Alethea Kehas

    Wise words, I strongly suspect you have many gifts she lacks. Envy is tough, though.

    Liked by 3 people

  12. ©️𝑃𝑎𝑜𝑙𝑎𝑃𝑖𝑜𝑙𝑒𝑡𝑡𝑖❃ Avatar
    ©️𝑃𝑎𝑜𝑙𝑎𝑃𝑖𝑜𝑙𝑒𝑡𝑡𝑖❃

    A good step over, great!

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Odee Bah Avatar
    Odee Bah

    I love this. “It is our differences that make us unique after all!” So true.

    Liked by 3 people

  14. daninmaya Avatar
    daninmaya

    It’s a good thought to use others success as a source of inspiration. It is an ongoing struggle to be honest with yourself. The ego can easily complicate things. I try to accept what I see and focus on the direction I want to go in. Good post!

    Liked by 4 people

  15. Faye ❤️ Avatar
    Faye ❤️

    Inspired

    Liked by 2 people

  16. vgeorg Avatar
    vgeorg

    So inspiring sparkling words! ✨

    Liked by 2 people

  17. Louise Salmone Avatar
    Louise Salmone

    very good analysis, which allows you to think, bravo! thank you very much
    Have a good day, 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  18. Jealousy is mental cancer — | Ned Hamson's Second Line View of the News Avatar
    Jealousy is mental cancer — | Ned Hamson's Second Line View of the News

    […] Jealousy is mental cancer — […]

    Like

  19. katelon Avatar
    katelon

    Great post. I admire how thoughtful and introspective you are, watching your reactions. That growth principle is a great concept to shift your focus. It’s wonderful you are learning so many great tools at a young age.

    Liked by 2 people

  20. Dorothy's New Vintage Kitchen Avatar
    Dorothy’s New Vintage Kitchen

    I do agree with the Sharma quote. In regard to jealousy, I believe that in one way or another, all the negative emotions have their root in fear. When I’m feeling envious of something, I ask myself what the root fear is, am I insecure, do I think I’m not good-smart-pretty-talented-whatever enough? This questioning always helps.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
      MD Mohinul islam

      Hmmm

      Like

  21. Shashi Avatar
    Shashi

    Very nice article. Simple and straight words. Thanks

    Liked by 3 people

    1. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
      MD Mohinul islam

      You absolutely right!

      Like

  22. hgamma Avatar
    hgamma

    i am in my life
    not become a master
    jealous,
    I confess,
    I already was

    The spirit and
    the soul is in us
    that me because of that
    a mental cancer
    must accommodate
    that was me in my
    imperfection
    in my world of experience
    never an event

    The monster is in all of us
    I don’t despise my dark side

    feeling and mind
    have to learn
    to get along
    with the attempt
    what went wrong
    in word and deed
    to do better

    There are so many
    great people
    i am the story of life
    not significant

    The greatest thing is
    the simple life
    to really live
    to be content with that

    Our goal is death

    our lifetime
    is too short
    we must try
    everyday
    our work
    to do with humility

    Not what we want
    not what we are talking about
    but doing
    and not doing
    for new insight
    do not miss

    Liked by 4 people

    1. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
      MD Mohinul islam

      Best of luck 🤞🤞🤞🤞

      Liked by 1 person

      1. hgamma Avatar
        hgamma

        একটি স্বপ্নের জার্নাল লিখুন
        তোমার জন্য সেরাটাই হোক

        Like

      2. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
        MD Mohinul islam

        Are you Bangali?

        Like

      3. hgamma Avatar
        hgamma

        হ্যালো এমডি মহিনুল ইসলাম
        আমি ইউরোপের একজন বৃদ্ধ মানুষ
        আপনার স্বপ্ন ব্যাখ্যা করার চেষ্টা করুন
        দিনের একটি ভাল অন্তর্দৃষ্টি জন্য

        Like

      4. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
        MD Mohinul islam

        Thank you! Great advice! Heartfelt love and congratulations to you! I hope you always help me with good advice!

        Liked by 1 person

      5. hgamma Avatar
        hgamma

        আত্না
        পরামর্শের মাধ্যমে আপনাকে জানাবে
        আপনার জীবনের জন্য দান করুন
        আমি একজন সহজ সরল মানুষ
        আমি কাউকে শিক্ষা দিতে পারি না

        Like

      6. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
        MD Mohinul islam

        I think the movement and behavior of a simple person is the most instructive!

        Liked by 1 person

      7. hgamma Avatar
        hgamma

        সহজতমটি সবচেয়ে কঠিন

        Like

      8. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
        MD Mohinul islam

        Absolutely right 👍

        Like

  23. taurusingemini Avatar
    taurusingemini

    There’s nothing wrong with jealousy, if it, helps you improve yourselves, and, keeps you working toward your goals, it’s only bad, if you let it, take you over, and, consumes you…

    Liked by 3 people

    1. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
      MD Mohinul islam

      I think so dear ❤️❤️❤️ beautiful friend!

      Like

  24. Lynette d'Arty-Cross Avatar
    Lynette d’Arty-Cross

    Many of our worst reactions and feelings are totally normal (and responsible for most of the world’s ills). It’s up to us to use our big brains to recognise them and work on them – as you’re doing. Cheers.

    Liked by 5 people

    1. Anil Avatar
      Anil

      well said

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Lynette d'Arty-Cross Avatar
        Lynette d’Arty-Cross

        Thank you. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      2. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
        MD Mohinul islam

        Right 👍👍👍

        Liked by 1 person

  25. Colleen James Avatar
    Colleen James

    Recognizing jealousy is such a good first step. Confessing it to God and then finding things to be grateful for in our own lives is a huge help. I don’t say these things lightly. I struggle with jealousy too. But God does not make mistakes. The way He made is, with our personalities, gifts, inclinations, and even what we see as limitations are a good gift from Him. I’m glad you ate able to turn things around and to let your feelings motivate you to be the best that you can be rather than growing bitter and letting jealousy fester.

    Liked by 4 people

    1. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
      MD Mohinul islam

      Very good writing!

      Liked by 1 person

  26. DC Gilbert Avatar
    DC Gilbert

    Reblogged this on D.C. Gilbert and commented:
    This intelligent 16-year-old young lady has a post here that a lot of Americans should read and then real spend some time thinking about.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
      MD Mohinul islam

      Hmmmm

      Like

  27. Carol anne Avatar
    Carol anne

    Jealousy is not a nice feeling! Its absolutely awful to feel this way!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
      MD Mohinul islam

      There should be some cases

      Like

  28. Shadabrana Khan Avatar
    Shadabrana Khan

    So inspiring,I do agree with this.
    Keep updating us with your good stuff.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
      MD Mohinul islam

      Hmm

      Like

  29. Saliha Waseem Avatar
    Saliha Waseem

    Great post Saania ❤️
    I ll appreciate if you would check out my post related to this topic.
    https://salihawaseem.wordpress.com/2021/09/08/jealousy-can-be-a-mean-for-you-to-have-a-stronger-faith/

    Liked by 2 people

    1. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
      MD Mohinul islam

      Absolutely wonderful post!

      Like

  30. josborne17602 Avatar
    josborne17602

    I’ve always thought there was a thin line between envy and jealousy. To me, jealousy means, “I want exactly what you have”.. that car, that figure, that boyfriend, etc. However, to me envy means a more passive emotion… I wish that I could write as well as he does, I wish my hair was as curly as hers (or as straight), I wish I had that gourmet kitchen I saw in a magazine. Wishing for something is a natural habit, while jealousy is a more aggressive passive anger that someone else has what you believe you deserve. Anyhow, that’s why I’m okay with envying people.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. MD Mohinul islam Avatar
      MD Mohinul islam

      Great idea

      Like

  31. Unknown Avatar
    Unknown

    This is so true and inspiring! ✨

    Liked by 1 person

  32. Bryan Wagner Avatar
    Bryan Wagner

    It’s appalling because our media encourages the marketplace mentality, and the resulting jealousy is the designed and hoped for reaction. We buy and attempt to manipulate ourselves into being other than we are in these moments. How sad.

    Liked by 1 person

  33. jahnavigouri13 Avatar
    jahnavigouri13

    Saania I truly love and enjoy every one of your posts. The wisdom they provide is life changing and deeply motivating! Loved this one!🌠

    Liked by 2 people

  34. Sandi Martinez Avatar
    Sandi Martinez

    The other side of this coin, is I’m nearly 100% that others are jealous of you! You have such brilliance and empathy, that you are a star in human clothing. From there, well, nothing else really matters does it? 🙏🏼💛

    Like

  35. picpholio Avatar
    picpholio

    This is so true but at the same time so sad….

    Like

  36. Ilma Hasan Avatar
    Ilma Hasan

    Very well written 👍

    Liked by 1 person

  37. Anil Avatar
    Anil

    Wonderful write up Saania. Very well written.
    Jealousy and envy are human emotions which are hard to overcome. Those who overcome the initial feeling of envy and take inspiration from it tend to succeed. Keep writing 👍

    Liked by 1 person

  38. The Typewriter Avatar
    The Typewriter

    Worth the read, must say.. Awesome.. True.. Inspiring.. 👍🏼😊👌🏼👌🏼👏🏼👏🏼

    Liked by 1 person

  39. Chagall Avatar
    Chagall

    I don’t know if I have ever been jealous of anyone – certainly not of who they were or their accomplishments. I might have coveted material things they had has a result of their good fortunes. Living on behalf of those you love enables seeing all that you have. IMHO: It is better to be sadly content with what you have, when you share that with wonderful people, than to have it all and be lonely.

    Liked by 1 person

  40. prejila Avatar
    prejila

    Very nice

    Like

  41. PNCO Avatar
    PNCO

    imho i think it’s very good that you recognize the jealousy. It can be a very tricky and hidden emotion i’ve learned from my teacher. Recognizing jealousy means you have a choice not to follow it.

    What i’ve learned throughout the years is that a great antidote for jealousy is to be happy for the success of others. Instead of focusing only on MY happiness, i can choose to appreciate that other people are succesful in their endeavours in life. In the end we all want to be happy, no one wants to suffer. Why not feel sympathetic joy if someone is happy or succesful? It’s much more fun 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  42. Yernasia Quorelios Avatar
    Yernasia Quorelios

    💎 – Diamond Hard – 💎

    💎 I AM pretty much free of envy and “jealousy” now EveryOne; because I realised I was chasing other peoples dreams…it was an ‘Aha, Lightbulb Moment’ when I Realised the Reason for Me Being envious and “jealous” was because I Desperately sought Parental APPROVAL!!! from Others; then I THOUGHT!!! Fuck It, I AM Doing My Own THING!!! however Selfish, Wierd and Spaced Out it may seem, NEVER!!! looked back in regret since

    http://www.ericberne.com

    💎 – Diamond Hard – 💎

    …💎💎💎…

    Like

  43. Gerry Palermo Avatar
    Gerry Palermo

    To thyself be true.

    Like

  44. Alan A. Malizia: Contagious Optimism! Co-Author Avatar
    Alan A. Malizia: Contagious Optimism! Co-Author

    Why wasted your time and energy on such a negative endeavor? Rather direct it toward finding a niche for yourself. We all have a place in this world; a worthwhile one at that. I spent two years in the aerospace industry before I realized it wasn’t for me. I ended up enjoying a fruitful career as a teacher and coach. I reached for the stars, yet found fulfillment in the hearts of my students and players.
    Saint Mother Teresa tells us: “Grow where you are planted.” All that you want to be is what you were meant to be. Don’t look without for your answer to happiness. look within.
    -Alan

    Liked by 1 person

  45. nedhamson Avatar
    nedhamson
  46. Priscilla Bettis Avatar
    Priscilla Bettis

    Jealousy is multi-faceted for sure. I LOVE Sharma’s quote!

    Like

  47. Palak Dogra ❤️ Avatar
    Palak Dogra ❤️

    This was an incredible read! Great work! ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  48. usfman Avatar
    usfman

    When you know too much about someone , you’re liable to think too much about them as well. Shall we be more selective in our encounters with others?

    Like

  49. Umang Patel Avatar
    Umang Patel

    Wow.. beautifully written conveying message very effectively.

    Like

  50. Chris Adedoyin Avatar
    Chris Adedoyin

    Jealousy breeds hate. When you celebrate the success of others, people will join you in your celebration. lovely post!

    Liked by 1 person

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