You have nothing to prove to anyone

Today’s world is difficult. And crazy. It is hard enough to find true happiness. What happens when we add in another person’s ideals about how we should live our lives or what defines our success? We feel exhausted, no?

The good news is that it is in our hands to break out of this nasty cycle. If there is one thing I’ve learnt, it is that our values are not determined based on external validation (other people’s approval of us).

I was once travelling to a different country and wanted to buy all my friends back home some souvenirs. I remember trying to search for a special gift for one of my special friends. I went from shop to shop looking for something they’d like with the temperature around me being 1°C. I was cold! And aching. But yet I never stopped looking until I eventually found a perfect present I knew would bring a smile to my friend’s face. When it came to giving the gift, however, my friend never appreciated it. For the next few days, I felt disheartened. That is until I realised that our value is inherent and not determined based on the way people treat us. I got the gifts with love and kindness in my heart – only I know that. Can I really control what happens after?

At the end of the day, we don’t have to prove anything to anyone. If you are someone who went out of their way to do something good for someone, but they didn’t notice it, you haven’t lost anything. You know why? Because no matter how the universe treats us, our values are what make us who we are. And values are what define our purpose. This is when we develop our own “personal truth”, after which the opinions of others stop mattering.

⁃ SaaniaSparkle 🧚🏻‍♀️

74 thoughts on “You have nothing to prove to anyone

  1. What a wise observation that can also work when family members dismiss gifts that we thought would be of special meaning to them. Sometimes it can also be the mood of the recipient and not that gift at all.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. 💎 – Diamond Hard – 💎

    💎 Having Returned to The Purity of My ChildLike State and Having Admitted, Acknowledged and Addressed My MMHI (Multiple Mental Health Issues) from My Conditioned UpBringing, http://www.ericberne.com , One of The Many Things I “Appreciate” is The Gift 🎁 of a Rock 🪨 from a Child because it is The Most Valuable THING!!! in Their Life and They CHOOSE!!! To Give It To Me; it Reminds Me That Giving is More Important than The Receipt of “Appreciation” ergo, basically if I AM Expecting “Appreciation” I Should NOT!!! Be Giving because it is My Issue if I Have MisUnderstood The Recipients ReAction or Lack ThereOf and Become RESENTFUL!!!

    💎 – Diamond Hard- 💎

    …💎💎💎…

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Gifting is a tricky task, Saania, as it sometimes may not meet with the receiver’s expectations. Why? Because of too much focus on price vis-a-vis value, on ostentation versus the thought behind the gift. What is really required, as you have set forth in your narrative, is to fortify our action with the right intention and leave the outcome to take care of itself.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. I totally agree, Saania! Very wise advice. ❤ In high school art class, I once worked very diligently to get a project perfect. My teacher did not seem to appreciate all the effort that had gone into it. I will never forget how that felt!

    Liked by 2 people

  5. As stated, it’s very important to establish your values
    as early in your life as possible. Without them, you will
    remain lost in this world of drastic ups and downs!
    A wonderful story to illustrate this, Saania. hugs, Eddie

    Liked by 2 people

  6. A couple of possibilities: could it be that you were trying to impress your friend? Or, maybe you don’t know your friend as well as you thought? Is this person actually a friend?
    I agree that ideally, we shouldn’t have to prove anything to others, but the reality (and human nature) is the opposite. We are always being required to prove ourselves, and sometimes we want to show others, too.
    Good post – very thoughtful. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  7. SMiLes Young SaaniaSparkle
    Probably Related it Before Yet
    i Find it Very True Once We
    Become Naked Enough Whole

    Complete Now

    All That’s Left to
    Do is Inhale Peace
    Exhale LoVE iN JoY
    oF LiGHT NoW Giving
    Sharing Caring Healing

    Free For All
    With Least Harm
    Truly When the For
    Giving Becomes Thanks
    Giving Essence of Receiving
    The Gift of Life is The Increase
    of Our Abilities to Naturally Give

    Sooner Or Later We Take Our Last
    Breath Might As Well Give it ALL AWaY Free For Now…
    Yet It’s True Reality is Real too Financial Independence Does Help…
    What Really Becomes Sad Is Folks Who Can Never GET Enough Even After That…:)

    Liked by 2 people

  8. The world is good, otherwise our mother could not have given birth to the world. We’re crazy ourselves. We are looking for happiness and have already received our gift, life. If a person asks us for help, we will freely try to give it to him. The difficulty is that we are and remain imperfect, we don’t want to face our own downsides. Finding success, finding true happiness, making our way there, and not doing the simple things necessary to survive, with our hubris making all our goals achievable for us, not only makes us, too those we all seem to love, exhausted and sick.

    The good news is that it is not good will alone that is in our hands, we have to reckon with the fact that good and bad are part of the cycle of life. From childhood we need the approval, the validation of others, so that as adults we have learned that all human beings are of indivisible dignity. Our values ​​must be shareable, not in excess, with the humblest, the untouchable, the weak.

    Value concepts are passed on to the following through the inner world, through the soul, through conscious processing, in a human life, and through the generations of transmission in the history of mankind.

    Not everything we do will be liked by others, the real truth lies in everything in between. determined in all people.
    The universe does not act, we have to check our values ​​every day, today they are right, tomorrow they are wrong. Human values ​​do not have to serve a purpose. Through new insight, working on ourselves, makes us what we really are.
    We are time in our short lifetime, we have to learn to get to know each other even better through the opinions of others.

    Liked by 3 people

  9. You are so wise beyond your years, Saania. For many, this enlightment doesn’t filter through until late in adulthood, if ever. Keep spreading your love, knowledge, and joy. You are touching many souls in a positive way.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. If you do something, make sure that it is something you appeciate doing, and not something you need aknowledgement for.
    In this case: the joy should be for thinking of your friend. Knowing that you love them, and you want to give them something. There should be no thought put behind praise.
    If they truely don’t care that you got them something: as you said, it doesn’t change the fact that you already purchased the item. Their reaction has no bearing on what happened in the past.

    That goes to the concept that I keep championing, though there is a good chance that I have the definition wrong. Death of the author: The idea where the work stands separate from the creator. My go-to example is how JKR has offended a large swath of her fan-base. There have been corners of the fandom talking of book burnings. The unfortunate fact is: she has already made the money off the sales of those books. Destroying personal copies does not effect her profits, and burning copies at a store actually increase her profits as they will need to replace the damaged ones. In that case, the best course of action is to no longer support anything with her name (or alias) attached.

    This rant is to cement the idea where if your friend does not have the appropriet reaction, to the point where it causes sadness, just consider never surprising them again. What you have done is done, and regretting your actions will just cause more pain.

    tl;dr

    make you happy, screw the haters.

    Liked by 2 people

  11. 💜 Please Exist, Experiment and Experience EveryOne; because people come and 🚶🏿‍♂️ 🎠 🚶‍♀️ 🚶 GO!!! in Our 3DLives…so many exes I Have (thank you Master Yoda) and many Dormant Friends (once a friend always a friend hence OUT OF THE BLUE!!! Communication) who I Have Fallen Out with EveryBody; with a Deceased Dad and Mad Mother 👩 🙄 😒 🤣 😂 🧑‍🍼 I “Appreciate” My Parents Well Meant Intentions in Raising Me but, To Be Perfectly Frank, They ARE/WERE Dumb ‘Grown Ups’ and this may sound Callous even EVIL!!! 😈 …yet I can’t help but “Appreciate” The Power of Youth to Challenge Convention by Innovating and Co-Creating; as opposed to The Parental, Dinosaur 🦕 😄 😀 💙 ❤️ 🦕 Philosophy of ‘WE HAVE ALWAYS DONE IT THIS WAY!!!’ http://www.ericberne.com

    …💛💚💙…

    Like

  12. Bonheur, ennuis, succès, déception ou échec – je ne sais pas ce qui vous attend pour la journée, mais je sais que tout ira bien c’est toujours un plaisir de venir te dire. Bonjour bonjour!
    Amitié de déposer un petit mot à tous mes amis amies Bise Bernard

    Like

    1. airstrikes; “well before 2030.” David Long

      @g3 30 `~ 22, March

      H3 asked; said I don’t understand – unafraid Switchblad3 chancer –

      This refers to a pint of G { uinness,} Coaur ‘ d amour

      Old English roots. that lay abord

      The south states

      “What’s the story, horse?” —

      Celestine II (1143–1144) onwards. The prophecy is attributed to 12th-century Irish Oahspe: A

      tea with milk and Stinger anti-aircraft missile” Mate

      (In Irish Gaelic: Go n-éirí an bóthar leat) 

      “Suffering from a double dose of original sin.”

      Real addition held

      birds?! B.S., I say! sympathize with the problem. a hand (unless ” Somebody bring me some water ”

      describe someone who’s, bed Kyiv?

      idiosyncrasies,

      no sugar

      – Fancy a cuppa tea?

      might he say, Schreibe eine Nachricht

      ”I wonna Come Over”-, an effort to get him to doubt cheeky pint drink order

      remit clout maybe smitten fanci with bend it like Beckham; you’ve left ”No Souvenirs” iconic

      However, you slice (bite?) sour cute & blogged darlin’.

      Sincker snogged shag: we3,! daggers to the heart. my bounty behold whiplash!!!

      Like

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