Hope and Disappointment

Hope is great, but it comes with a downside—disappointment. When we’re hit with this feeling after being hopeful, it hurts. There is really no way around it. The more time we spend fantasizing about how amazing it would be to win, the greater our disappointment is likely to be when we lose.

However, disappointment is a part of life. In relationships, schools, things, and in ourselves. Ever since I was little, I have expected my relationships with friends to go a certain way. However, they didn’t always steer in that direction. At one point, I was tired of being let down by the people I care about. Sometimes, it can even be hard to tell if we should give our friend another chance or try to move on – is it even them or is it us? Over time though, I’ve realised how in real life, it is rare to find one person who will fit all the “boxes” we expect the people around us to fill, and for this it is important to know what to expect from people. For example, if we know we have a fake friend, we may choose not to rely on them for plans to hang out. Instead, we could decide to see them spontaneously or with a group of people, so the consequences of them not showing up aren’t severe (and heartbreaking!).

Similarly with things, we must remind ourselves that if we buy into the myths of perfection, we will end up hurting ourselves and the people in our lives. Myths that we pick up from movies, songs, and simply what the world or Instagram highlight reels are telling us will often clash with reality. Instead, we can avoid the stress and suffering by accepting that life isn’t meant to be perfect, and so we don’t have to be perfect. For this I have learnt to adjust my expectations a little bit – what do I think is realistically possible to achieve with what I have? This isn’t to say that we shouldn’t dream big. But if we do, we need to have a healthy relationship with failure and setbacks. Instead, I like to dream big while taking tiny steps.

Also, when I am disappointed with how a situation turns out, I ask myself: Will this matter in 2 years? Or even 2 weeks? So many times I have lost in petty class quizzes/competitions and felt like a complete loser. But asking myself the above questions is the one thing that has helped me greatly to not make mountains out of molehills and instantly feel better.

All in all, disappointment is unnerving because it reminds us that no matter how hard we try, we can never control other people or external circumstances. The good news is that we have the power to control ourselves! Our thoughts, our attitudes, our actions. So, when reality doesn’t match your picture of what could have been, choose to look for beauty in the rubble. Choose optimism.

-SaaniaSparkle 🧚🏻‍♀️

87 thoughts on “Hope and Disappointment

    1. {age 30 } witn

      

      witnessed a pretty little car crash,-

      The beginning of some;

      painted silhouettes walls everywhere ( abstracted images ) Funny someone got arrested for 15 minutes: Prolia – Ha.. Ha.. Ha

      dropping & falling [” heirlooms; items to survive } rat licking?? closure!

      . My honoured belittled soul, guess { pleads } un unknown ” Josh – alexia ” demonstration code

      [ What are more flattering ways Honouring freedom we hold… Burry your soul in

      No one gave two cents damn about me… One blue- green mushed pillow means{ I’m ok } – sorry for this uncommon writing online… life’s full of hate with all limited scolding, lines be lyrical.. pertain roman toads word

      anger of ” The Winning Whiner ” janky- wholes dicking spoiled brat

      ” I told her ”! ( What slut? )

      ”then she writes;”

      I just: don’t care of her: no idea here: greed zon3 until el3ven; maybe ten ( nightly until mid- morning )

      fame fam of death; ”really”! the world is dying

      break the pen over craziness – { SNAP! Click } Darling!

      making hers better. 😊🌹 Just let me cry myself to death babe…

      Where’s my Scheinlder beauty. maybe release all pain like [ ahem ]

      … Ga,me of ;life— Peace! Snosh” { spring ]

      

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Powerful words Sparkle! So wise and it holds so much truth. Disappointment is a part of life, but we must realise that life isn’t supposed to be perfect all the time.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Very good post! I started to train myself not to expect anything from people, tgen situation or their actions won’t upset me. Quite hard to do, but it’s great feeling not to react on unexpected things.
    Have a wonderful day Saania!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Hope is always very good. When we though expect too much then we really get disappointed. Keep hope up and don’t expect too much! Dealing with disappointment- you are so right with your thinking. Thank you

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I have observed many parents trying to shield their children from disappointment and from the hard things that happen in life. It is so much more important to demonstrate to them that we all have disappointments and hard times, but we carry on, we live through it, and maybe the next time our hopes will be realized.
    I’ve always loved the Emily Dickinson poem 314:
    “Hope” is the thing with feathers –
    That perches in the soul –
    And sings the tune without the words –
    And never stops – at all –

    Liked by 3 people

  5. I think it’s important to distinguish between hope and expectation. Expectation can lead to terrible disappointments because when we expect things, we expect them, we believe there’s a guarantee. I think hope is gentler and more realistic. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  6. 💎 LIFE EQUATIONS

    💎 – Diamond Hard – 💎

    💎 WANT + DEMAND = EXPECTATION + “DISAPPOINTMENT”

    💎 DESIRE + HOPE = ACCEPTANCE – “DISAPPOINTMENT”

    💎 Put Simply EveryOne, if We ARE Able to Be Alone but NOT!!! Lonely and Happy in Solitude then The Company of Others is a Bonus; in fact Company can Oft Be or Become Oh So Extremely TIRESOME!!!

    💎 – Diamond Hard – 💎

    …💎💎💎…

    Like

  7. In order to know how to win, one first must know how to lose. In any competition or contest, there are always lots of losers, but only one winner. Chances are, you will lose much more often than you will win.
    Life is only a competition if we make it one. Kudos to Lynette for distinguishing between hope and expectation. Most relationships explode over expectations. They heal with hope.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. i ll try not to be too long
    fr pat is a monk retired
    he said our homework is hope to cope
    learn now as a young woman
    people talk but the majority of it is gas
    bull shit
    it will pass
    life is a gift
    if you can give a lift
    llike your blog
    it is a gift of your time
    and is well worth reading too
    so a happy freaking day to you
    !!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. SMiLes Hope iS A Wonderful

    Place if THere Are MiSSiNG

    Parts of Life

    Autotelic

    Meditating

    Contemplating

    Flow

    That Comes As
    Faith Now Is Naked
    Whole Complete And Enough

    Never the Less Hope Has Its Place

    Yet Faith is The Completion of HoPE NoW

    SMiLes

    Yet Only

    When it is Now

    iN Flow Young
    SaaniaSparkle iN Faith
    Best Inhaling Peace Exhaling
    Love For All Giving Caring Now
    Sharing Freely With Least Harm For All..:)

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Dear saania
    Wonderful. Post True. Hope for the best
    Butprepair. Yourself for the worst Saania in life. Everybody has hope for good things but. Life is not so easy things will not go according to your wish One can do only the best karan is only in your hands but result is not in your hands. One has to accept destiny. Happily and moov on. Saania. May you shine like a star in future my blessings are with you Waiting for your. Next Blog Dadi. Sudha

    Liked by 1 person

  11. We must make a choice to love whatever it is we are trying to do and if everyone does not like it, than that should never affect your decision to love t, because this is your choice and no one else’s. You are correct, none of us is perfect, thank God, because if we were all perfect, how boring would that be, right?! Hope is always a positive choice, while many people tend to focus on disappointments if they come. When you are dealing with people, there will always be those who are excited to see you fail, while others are hoping you will excel. If you are grounded in your faith, then you always have a positive support group that matters and the others, well they can soak in their disappointments all they want to!

    Liked by 2 people

  12. “The good news is that we have the power to control ourselves! Our thoughts, our attitudes, our actions. So, when reality doesn’t match your picture of what could have been, choose to look for beauty in the rubble. Choose optimism.”

    I love this conclusion. Your words are words of hope. Thanks.

    Liked by 1 person

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