The other day when I was texting a friend, I noticed how impatient and grumpy I felt when she didn’t reply and get back to me. There were similar instances with other people wherein I felt irked the same way. However, it made me wonder why my happiness is dependent on external factors. And, ultimately, just how wrong this is!

We haven’t actually ever been taught to look inside of ourselves. Our worlds are not exactly set up to help us discover our personal boundaries in pursuit of growth, and we are therefore encouraged to cling onto external events in the hopes that we will be happy after, and with the hopes that they will calm our troubled hearts and minds. But quite fortunately enough, true happiness can be found within us.

Internal happiness is when our happiness is influenced by our own realizations, mindsets or thought processes. The weight of other people’s thoughts and opinions can easily become a burden for us, but once we learn to let go, it feels like taking a nice deep breath for the first time. We see the world as different. We feel happiness from within ourselves.

I also realized that people don’t care as much as we think they do! We all have a life of our own to worry about, and all the problems that come with living it. Even though it may seem like we are constantly being scrutinized, it is unlikely that someone is spending much of their time thinking about us at all. We will lose our minds trying to make sure that everyone responds to us the way we want them to, so ultimately, people’s opinions and actions don’t matter. Thankfully, happiness is a skill that can be cultivated, and it is entirely within our reach.

The hard truth is that we can’t please everyone, nor can we control the things that happen to us (all the time). It is impossible to live up to everyone’s expectations and it is impossible to achieve everything we desire exactly when and how we want. So there is no point in burning ourselves out in trying to do so since perfectionism is a destination wherein we will hardly ever arrive. The important thing, however, is that we make sure that one of the people we do please is ourselves!

– SaaniaSparkle 🧚🏻‍♀️

144 responses to “True Happiness is Internal”

  1. Jane Fritz Avatar
    Jane Fritz

    Reblogged this on Robby Robin's Journey and commented:
    I have shared the wisdom of 16-year old Saania Sparkle, philosopher and blogger, on previous occasions. This recent post of hers highlights an incredibly important ingredient of self-care. Most of us take a lifetime to figure this out, but fortunately we have young sage Saania to remind us of the importance of doing things that are important to us rather than spending so much time trying to please others.

    As she describes it within:
    “Internal happiness is when our happiness is influenced by our own realizations, mindsets or thought processes. The weight of other people’s thoughts and opinions can easily become a burden for us, but once we learn to let go, it feels like taking a nice deep breath for the first time. We see the world as different. We feel happiness from within ourselves.”

    I encourage you to read her full post, which is short and to the point. Thank you, Saania.

    Like

  2. AMWatson207 Avatar
    AMWatson207

    I am 65 and am just learning the kind of things you are writing about. I have much to learn, but have to pause and thank you for your perspective and sharing. 🙏

    Like

  3. Island Traveler Avatar
    Island Traveler

    True

    Like

  4. Sabik Hasan Avatar
    Sabik Hasan

    It’s amazing !

    Like

  5. argyris446 Avatar
    argyris446

    Reblogged this on worldtraveller70.

    Like

  6. writersiyandamzolo Avatar
    writersiyandamzolo

    So true Saania. And I so much wish people can grow to understand this each and every day ✨✊

    Like

  7. alicjaszrednickamondritzki Avatar
    alicjaszrednickamondritzki

    only intelligent people and sages reflect on their lives, the rest of people just experience it … like a runny nose or the flu

    Like

  8. Inese, visual artist, writer and life sciences blogger Avatar
    Inese, visual artist, writer and life sciences blogger

    It looks like you learned that early and that’s good.
    It’s not always that we can have somebody around, and it can happen that one has to be alone for a long time.
    People who have lived without internet and without any phone, not to mention the smart phone, that’s like me, close to retirement, had to always rely on themselves. There was nobody to ask for help or no place to get advice.
    The only thing I do not get is how can text message and response to it make one happy or unhappy. Well, there is a long way ahead of you. Lots of things are oh-soooo unimportant which seem to be critical until some 30 years or so. Some people have smarts early on and some never grow up.
    Well, people experience happiness here and there, but nobody is happy 24/7. Certainly, it is the best we do not depend on opinion of others. You noticed it right: people who do not know you, won’t even look or think as you pass by because everybody is busy with their own problems.
    Take care!

    Like

  9. Harbans Avatar
    Harbans

    Wonderful sharing indeed.😀😀

    Liked by 3 people

  10. Americaoncoffee Avatar
    Americaoncoffee

    I like the way you’ve stated this truth.💞💫

    Like

  11. ellaaray Avatar
    ellaaray

    Well said 👌

    Like

  12. Rabia Akram Avatar
    Rabia Akram

    “The hard truth is that we can’t please everyone, nor can we control the things that happen to us (all the time).” Rightly said.

    Like

  13. exceptionalstar Avatar
    exceptionalstar

    Quite insightful but I have a question. How do one build internal happiness, practical ways?

    Like

  14. Jorge Medico Avatar
    Jorge Medico

    You are learning a very important lesson. You have no control over what happens in the world, only how you react to it. Your wisdom far exceeds your age 🙂

    Like

  15. scumlikeuschurch Avatar
    scumlikeuschurch

    blessings and thanks for the encouragement

    Like

  16. gifted50 Avatar
    gifted50

    So wise!. And filled with plain truth, I wish I knew this sooner.

    Like

  17. marlapaige Avatar
    marlapaige

    I am learning this now. I wish I learned it a lot sooner!

    Like

  18. रूबरूwithइशिता Avatar
    रूबरूwithइशिता

    You are amazing.
    Great post 👌❤️

    Like

  19. Vinay Nagaraju Avatar
    Vinay Nagaraju

    You’re right, this reminds me of a lovely quote – a person who thinks more than necessary suffers more than necessary. Happiness is a beautiful state of mind and we’re more in control of it than the external circumstances. Perhaps we need a constant and conscious reminder that we’re in control of this happiness and not the other way round. Nice post.

    Like

  20. dawnfanshawe Avatar
    dawnfanshawe

    Absolutely!!! It’s taken me a long time to realise this. Thank you.

    Like

  21. Time Traveler of Life Avatar
    Time Traveler of Life

    Reblogged this on Time Traveler on the road of Life and commented:
    If we try to please everyone we end up making ourselves miserable, because it can’t be done.

    Like

  22. usfman Avatar
    usfman

    Based on this thought of self searching happiness, I try to avoid being trapped by the gossipy nature of social media. How about you?

    Like

  23. Being Better Avatar
    Being Better

    Exactly. We cannot please everyone. Not even anyone continuously. Happiness we need to unearth from ourselves.
    Well written. Keep posting.

    Like

  24. Aarushi Sehgal Avatar
    Aarushi Sehgal

    Really true!

    Like

  25. Cheryl, Gulf Coast Poet Avatar
    Cheryl, Gulf Coast Poet

    Saania, So true. We cannot control the actions of others, only try to control how we react to them! ❤
    all the best!

    Like

  26. clcouch123 Avatar
    clcouch123

    An excellent post and I can relate with your grumpiness. We have our expectations of others and are concerned with their expectations and those of the wider world as well. Between friends, I hope we can be lenient; and regarding the world, you’re right to note that by and large it is concerned with its own issues. In any situation, though, it’s better that we know ourselves. Especially from the inside out. I appreciate your insight and hope you are really well these days.

    Like

  27. digitalbloggingdaily Avatar
    digitalbloggingdaily

    Woah sis!! Well said…. I completely agree with you😃☺😊🤩

    Like

  28. Akriti Pandya Avatar
    Akriti Pandya

    Beautiful post 😍

    Like

  29. jacksjottings Avatar
    jacksjottings

    A book you may like “ Lessons in Stoicism.” John Sellars.

    Like

  30. Tilly travel Avatar
    Tilly travel

    such wise words

    Like

  31. Diti Sen Avatar
    Diti Sen

    Yes, it’s only we take back the power to be happy in our own hands that we realise true happiness. Keep Sparkling, Saania !

    Like

  32. aruna3 Avatar
    aruna3

    Indeed.

    Like

  33. Joanne A Avatar
    Joanne A

    Happiness is something we create inside of ourselves.

    Like

  34. Tiger & Lion Avatar
    Tiger & Lion

    Wonderfully written! If you haven’t read his work, Don Miguel Ruiz is an author who I recommend, and has conveyed this message over and over again.

    Like

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