The other day when I was texting a friend, I noticed how impatient and grumpy I felt when she didn’t reply and get back to me. There were similar instances with other people wherein I felt irked the same way. However, it made me wonder why my happiness is dependent on external factors. And, ultimately, just how wrong this is!

We haven’t actually ever been taught to look inside of ourselves. Our worlds are not exactly set up to help us discover our personal boundaries in pursuit of growth, and we are therefore encouraged to cling onto external events in the hopes that we will be happy after, and with the hopes that they will calm our troubled hearts and minds. But quite fortunately enough, true happiness can be found within us.

Internal happiness is when our happiness is influenced by our own realizations, mindsets or thought processes. The weight of other people’s thoughts and opinions can easily become a burden for us, but once we learn to let go, it feels like taking a nice deep breath for the first time. We see the world as different. We feel happiness from within ourselves.

I also realized that people don’t care as much as we think they do! We all have a life of our own to worry about, and all the problems that come with living it. Even though it may seem like we are constantly being scrutinized, it is unlikely that someone is spending much of their time thinking about us at all. We will lose our minds trying to make sure that everyone responds to us the way we want them to, so ultimately, people’s opinions and actions don’t matter. Thankfully, happiness is a skill that can be cultivated, and it is entirely within our reach.

The hard truth is that we can’t please everyone, nor can we control the things that happen to us (all the time). It is impossible to live up to everyone’s expectations and it is impossible to achieve everything we desire exactly when and how we want. So there is no point in burning ourselves out in trying to do so since perfectionism is a destination wherein we will hardly ever arrive. The important thing, however, is that we make sure that one of the people we do please is ourselves!

– SaaniaSparkle 🧚🏻‍♀️

144 responses to “True Happiness is Internal”

  1. equipsblog Avatar
    equipsblog

    Once again how can you be so young and so is?. I couldn’t find happiness on someone’s shelf, I could only find it within myself.

    Liked by 12 people

  2. equipsblog Avatar
    equipsblog

    * so wise, not is?

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Timothy Price Avatar
    Timothy Price

    Even after the enlightenment there are so many cultural influences working against people to be happy with themselves.

    Liked by 4 people

  4. Susan Joy Clark Avatar
    Susan Joy Clark

    It can be hard not to be influenced by outside things, but this is true.

    Liked by 10 people

    1. Kaycee Avatar
      Kaycee

      Sure

      Liked by 4 people

  5. contoveros Avatar
    contoveros

    This reminded me of a song from years ago:

    “. . .You see, you can’t please everyone
    So you got to please yourself . . .”

    — Ricky Nelson, “Garden Party” 1972

    Liked by 10 people

  6. thewanderlustarcher Avatar
    thewanderlustarcher

    What a beautiful way to start off the month of May. With some words of wisdom, straight from the heart and experience. This was everything, everyone feels. You’re not alone with these feels and I’m glad you expressed it. It’s very hard to see yourself as your own critic and to only care about your expectations of yourself and not so much of what you THINK others are thinking/saying about you. It’s so hard. But all we can do is try, keep going as the days flow and live our lives in our truest forms. It’s so important to make ourselves happy. This was a gem to read this morning. Thanks so much for it !

    Liked by 13 people

  7. Nika Life Coach Avatar
    Nika Life Coach

    great post

    Liked by 5 people

  8. hgamma Avatar
    hgamma

    The dependence
    in the entanglements
    from inside and outside

    in which we
    in the reality
    our little I
    protect and care

    the inside
    the mirror
    of the world

    the outside
    our senses
    the world

    everything; every experience
    every event
    leaves its mark
    in consciousness
    in our
    whole body back

    with the constant attempt
    to compensate
    in an in between

    Liked by 8 people

  9. grandfathersky Avatar
    grandfathersky

    Try living with notifications turned off on your phone. Eve the battery charge % can make us anxious. It’s a great experiment to see how much we are looking for “external” approvals 🤓

    Liked by 7 people

    1. Kaycee Avatar
      Kaycee

      Lol

      Liked by 3 people

  10. texasflashdude Avatar
    texasflashdude

    Happiness can also be defined as a “lack of unhappiness.”
    So, let’s start there.
    Unhappiness is most often caused by one of two things:
    1. Worry, or regret, or sorrow, or loss about something that happened in the PAST, or
    2. Impatience, worry, or fear about something that could, or will, happen in the FUTURE.
    In the case of your failed reply to your text, it was about an expectation of a future event that was unfulfilled. FUTURE.
    One of the most difficult things to do is to stay PRESENT. Be focused on the NOW. You can’t change the past, and the future is beyond your control. Those are the triggers of unhappiness, so don’t stay and dwell on the past, or the future.
    I actually use the color blue to bring me back to the present. I see blue in the sky, in the water, and many other places. It’s a calming color, and it also reminds me to come back to the present and enjoy the NOW.
    Works for me.

    Liked by 6 people

  11. Umi Aimen Kundangar Avatar
    Umi Aimen Kundangar

    This post was a beautiful start to the day …Keep writing for your posts clearly reflect some beautiful truths every time you post …👍

    Liked by 4 people

  12. utahan15 Avatar
    utahan15

    the same words when i was your age
    i was a paper boy and now there are none
    like pay phones, and clothes lines
    and people would talk to one another
    no back wards hats
    no device in back pocket
    so old am i
    and happy in my skin
    good luck to you too
    you write well
    i can tell
    kudos
    et al

    Liked by 5 people

  13. Suzette Benjamin Avatar
    Suzette Benjamin

    Great points Saania! Yes happiness is our world within not outside of the self. We live our entire life within our own thoughts and thinking process, there is where happiness resides. Yes, I agree with you that we make happiness and internal, intrinsic pleasing of self.
    As always you have a delightful way of sharing wisdom in great light. Cheers.😊

    Liked by 7 people

  14. Languageo'heart Avatar
    Languageo’heart

    True

    Liked by 4 people

  15. Julia Avatar
    Julia

    With technology today our sights are set on the opinions of others even more. We only find true peace and happiness in what God thinks of us and what His opinion is. A life lived for Him has GENUINE rewards that are not just for the life we now live, but eternally. Such a good article! Blessings Always.
    Julia

    Liked by 7 people

  16. theclampettsblog Avatar
    theclampettsblog

    This is very true and you are a wise gal to recognize this! I always have figured
    it takes a life time to come to this conclusion. Good job!

    Liked by 8 people

  17. iamthesunking Avatar
    iamthesunking

    I used to take it VERY personally when people didn’t keep in touch regularly, but now I realise that sometimes life just gets in the way.

    Liked by 6 people

  18. Kaycee Avatar
    Kaycee

    Beautiful

    Liked by 5 people

  19. AnuRag Avatar
    AnuRag

    Great post ✍️yes happiness is internal.if it is dependent on external factors then it can’t be long lasting.

    Liked by 4 people

  20. vgeorg Avatar
    vgeorg

    Internal happiness is eternal.
    Congratulations!🙂

    Liked by 7 people

  21. ahiricreates Avatar
    ahiricreates

    Wow!! Such a thoughtful and true topic it is!! Loved reading it! Each and every line says so much! Great Beginning to the month of May!

    Loved the line you wrote:
    “Internal happiness is when our happiness is influenced by our own realizations, mindsets or thought processes”
    Very true it is!!

    Keep writing such amazing ones and stay happy always! ✨❤️

    Liked by 6 people

  22. ashok Avatar
    ashok

    Happiness is simply a decision and is very much an internal stuff.
    You would like my book Saania.

    Liked by 5 people

  23. Malcom Wessing Avatar
    Malcom Wessing

    Hard but needful truths you do expound here, Ms. Sparkle. Your wisdom is way beyond your years! Glad to immerse myself in it!

    Liked by 7 people

  24. Gerry Palermo Avatar
    Gerry Palermo

    Thoughtful post.

    Liked by 4 people

  25. lssattitudeofgratitude Avatar
    lssattitudeofgratitude

    I am always happy when I see your post pop up in my reader. Your thoughts are wise. Happiness does indeed come from within.

    Liked by 7 people

  26. stockdalewolfe Avatar
    stockdalewolfe

    So true!

    Liked by 4 people

  27. picpholio Avatar
    picpholio

    We all have to make our own happiness within ourselves (or at least our happy moments)
    Have a nice weekend,
    Rudi

    Liked by 5 people

  28. Sumita Tah Avatar
    Sumita Tah

    You do have a lovely life ahead. It took me decades to find this wisdom. Bless you. ❤

    Liked by 6 people

  29. katiemiafrederick Avatar
    katiemiafrederick

    SMiles Young Saania
    Sparkle We LiVE iN An
    Illusory World That
    Grades All We

    Do From Birth

    A Thru F As Such
    Dollar Higher Or Low
    Externally Now Too

    Where All We Are Truly
    Evolved To Do is Forage
    Hand in Hand Now To

    Eat

    Love

    Free

    In All Ways
    Love Breathes

    We’ve Become

    The Tools That Were
    Supposed To Make
    Eating Easier Now

    Folks Have
    Become The
    Tools Sadly Separated
    From The Nature of

    Love

    That

    Only

    Eats To Give

    The Only Solution
    Is To Disrobe And
    BREaTHE Nature

    Of Love

    Again

    Yes For

    Giving

    Is Inherent
    Thanks GiVinG LoVE NoW🌻

    Liked by 5 people

  30. Saba Saxena Avatar
    Saba Saxena

    True Saania so be happy always and don’t let others judge you n control over your happiness 🥰🥰🥰

    Liked by 5 people

  31. Lynette d'Arty-Cross Avatar
    Lynette d’Arty-Cross

    There’s a big difference between being irritated for a short time and being unhappy. Outside things can dent us or knock us askew, but our equilibrium (or happiness or lack of it) remains the same. There’s an old saying: leopards don’t change their spots.

    Liked by 5 people

  32. susankgray Avatar
    susankgray

    Lovely post! Words of wisdom. Thanks for the insight!

    Liked by 4 people

  33. Eddie Two Hawks Avatar
    Eddie Two Hawks

    Lovely dear, lovely

    Liked by 5 people

  34. Maria - FlowingWatersArt Avatar
    Maria – FlowingWatersArt

    Very true and well said Saania. Don’t give your power of happiness to some one else. Hold on tight to your power and be happy just because you can! Easier said the done at times, but when you catch yourself going off course, you can get back on track faster. Have a great weekend💖

    Liked by 6 people

  35. Orvillewrong Avatar
    Orvillewrong

    If you can love yourself, who else matters!

    Liked by 6 people

  36. nedhamson Avatar
    nedhamson
  37. Love Alone Avatar
    Love Alone

    Reblogged this on Love and Love Alone.

    Liked by 4 people

  38. D’Nanda Panda Avatar
    D’Nanda Panda

    Wise and loving words….Well done!

    Liked by 5 people

  39. DutchIl Avatar
    DutchIl

    Thank you for sharing!!… “It is not easy to find happiness within ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.” (Agnes Repplier )… 🙂

    Until we meet again..
    May your troubles be less
    Your blessings be more
    And nothing but happiness
    Come through your door
    (Irish Saying)

    Liked by 5 people

  40. wheatypetesworld Avatar
    wheatypetesworld

    Do you know what your friend’ circumstances/mindset/state of internal happiness my have been that made her not reply?

    Liked by 4 people

  41. Dragthepen Avatar
    Dragthepen

    Absolutely the truth ❤️

    Liked by 4 people

  42. wheatypetesworld Avatar
    wheatypetesworld

    Ooo silly typos: I meant – Do you know what your friend’s circumstances/mindset/state of internal happiness may have been that made her not reply?

    Liked by 4 people

  43. Cindy Georgakas Avatar
    Cindy Georgakas

    Great wisdom Saania. We sure do need to listen to our own internal messages! 💖💖💖💖

    Liked by 4 people

  44. Lakshya Agrawal Avatar
    Lakshya Agrawal

    So true! We often remain so engrossed in evaluating ourselves from the eyes of others that we tend to forget that we too are allowed to view ourself from our eyes (self-reflection). As you said, the real happiness lies within. ✌

    Liked by 8 people

  45. katelon Avatar
    katelon

    I agree. This dark timeline keeps people in economic slavery and struggling so much that it seems friendship, deep sustainable, attentive friendship has been put on the back burner. I think that the media and all the involvement in social media, too, has trained people to have superficial relationships rather than friendships where people truly listen to each other, reciprocate attention, make deep intimate connections of care and support, where people follow through and truly engage.

    I have friends that don’t even reply to emails anymore or phone calls, and often, not even FB messaging, choosing instead to rely on FB comments only. That isn’t friendship, it isn’t intimacy. Texting is easy, and quick but it really isn’t meant to replace true communication.

    I stayed in a room in a guy’s apt. who was great at texting conversations but would walk right by me without a word.

    I’m ready for the new light timeline.

    Liked by 7 people

  46. maxilpoeta Avatar
    maxilpoeta

    una vera perla di saggezza questa tua riflessione, non possiamo accontentare tutti, ed è inutile pensare a ciò che la gente penserà di noi, ci faremo solo del male, e non vedremo la vera felicità che è solo dentro di noi, e che solo noi possiamo donarci ogni volta che lo vogliamo…👏👏👏👍😉

    Liked by 4 people

  47. Jan Avatar
    Jan

    This is so true, thank you for sharing

    Liked by 5 people

  48. Dorothy's New Vintage Kitchen Avatar
    Dorothy’s New Vintage Kitchen

    Wise words. I agree totally that we fret more about what others are thinking, when in reality, they aren’t thinking that much about us to begin with! Everyone is in their own little bubble, and the bubbles seem to be getting thicker as people find themselves hooked onto their electronics but not I’m a way that is real human connection.

    Liked by 6 people

  49. llavorgna Avatar
    llavorgna

    Reblogged this on La solitudine del Prof.

    Liked by 5 people

  50. Peace and unity in our lives Avatar
    Peace and unity in our lives

    A very piece of interesting writing indeed. I enjoy every bit of it. Keep it up.

    Liked by 4 people

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