True Happiness is Internal

The other day when I was texting a friend, I noticed how impatient and grumpy I felt when she didn’t reply and get back to me. There were similar instances with other people wherein I felt irked the same way. However, it made me wonder why my happiness is dependent on external factors. And, ultimately, just how wrong this is!

We haven’t actually ever been taught to look inside of ourselves. Our worlds are not exactly set up to help us discover our personal boundaries in pursuit of growth, and we are therefore encouraged to cling onto external events in the hopes that we will be happy after, and with the hopes that they will calm our troubled hearts and minds. But quite fortunately enough, true happiness can be found within us.

Internal happiness is when our happiness is influenced by our own realizations, mindsets or thought processes. The weight of other people’s thoughts and opinions can easily become a burden for us, but once we learn to let go, it feels like taking a nice deep breath for the first time. We see the world as different. We feel happiness from within ourselves.

I also realized that people don’t care as much as we think they do! We all have a life of our own to worry about, and all the problems that come with living it. Even though it may seem like we are constantly being scrutinized, it is unlikely that someone is spending much of their time thinking about us at all. We will lose our minds trying to make sure that everyone responds to us the way we want them to, so ultimately, people’s opinions and actions don’t matter. Thankfully, happiness is a skill that can be cultivated, and it is entirely within our reach.

The hard truth is that we can’t please everyone, nor can we control the things that happen to us (all the time). It is impossible to live up to everyone’s expectations and it is impossible to achieve everything we desire exactly when and how we want. So there is no point in burning ourselves out in trying to do so since perfectionism is a destination wherein we will hardly ever arrive. The important thing, however, is that we make sure that one of the people we do please is ourselves!

– SaaniaSparkle 🧚🏻‍♀️

139 thoughts on “True Happiness is Internal

  1. Reblogged this on Robby Robin's Journey and commented:
    I have shared the wisdom of 16-year old Saania Sparkle, philosopher and blogger, on previous occasions. This recent post of hers highlights an incredibly important ingredient of self-care. Most of us take a lifetime to figure this out, but fortunately we have young sage Saania to remind us of the importance of doing things that are important to us rather than spending so much time trying to please others.

    As she describes it within:
    “Internal happiness is when our happiness is influenced by our own realizations, mindsets or thought processes. The weight of other people’s thoughts and opinions can easily become a burden for us, but once we learn to let go, it feels like taking a nice deep breath for the first time. We see the world as different. We feel happiness from within ourselves.”

    I encourage you to read her full post, which is short and to the point. Thank you, Saania.

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  2. I am 65 and am just learning the kind of things you are writing about. I have much to learn, but have to pause and thank you for your perspective and sharing. 🙏

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  3. It looks like you learned that early and that’s good.
    It’s not always that we can have somebody around, and it can happen that one has to be alone for a long time.
    People who have lived without internet and without any phone, not to mention the smart phone, that’s like me, close to retirement, had to always rely on themselves. There was nobody to ask for help or no place to get advice.
    The only thing I do not get is how can text message and response to it make one happy or unhappy. Well, there is a long way ahead of you. Lots of things are oh-soooo unimportant which seem to be critical until some 30 years or so. Some people have smarts early on and some never grow up.
    Well, people experience happiness here and there, but nobody is happy 24/7. Certainly, it is the best we do not depend on opinion of others. You noticed it right: people who do not know you, won’t even look or think as you pass by because everybody is busy with their own problems.
    Take care!

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  4. You’re right, this reminds me of a lovely quote – a person who thinks more than necessary suffers more than necessary. Happiness is a beautiful state of mind and we’re more in control of it than the external circumstances. Perhaps we need a constant and conscious reminder that we’re in control of this happiness and not the other way round. Nice post.

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  5. An excellent post and I can relate with your grumpiness. We have our expectations of others and are concerned with their expectations and those of the wider world as well. Between friends, I hope we can be lenient; and regarding the world, you’re right to note that by and large it is concerned with its own issues. In any situation, though, it’s better that we know ourselves. Especially from the inside out. I appreciate your insight and hope you are really well these days.

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