The other day when I was texting a friend, I noticed how impatient and grumpy I felt when she didn’t reply and get back to me. There were similar instances with other people wherein I felt irked the same way. However, it made me wonder why my happiness is dependent on external factors. And, ultimately, just how wrong this is!
We haven’t actually ever been taught to look inside of ourselves. Our worlds are not exactly set up to help us discover our personal boundaries in pursuit of growth, and we are therefore encouraged to cling onto external events in the hopes that we will be happy after, and with the hopes that they will calm our troubled hearts and minds. But quite fortunately enough, true happiness can be found within us.
Internal happiness is when our happiness is influenced by our own realizations, mindsets or thought processes. The weight of other people’s thoughts and opinions can easily become a burden for us, but once we learn to let go, it feels like taking a nice deep breath for the first time. We see the world as different. We feel happiness from within ourselves.
I also realized that people don’t care as much as we think they do! We all have a life of our own to worry about, and all the problems that come with living it. Even though it may seem like we are constantly being scrutinized, it is unlikely that someone is spending much of their time thinking about us at all. We will lose our minds trying to make sure that everyone responds to us the way we want them to, so ultimately, people’s opinions and actions don’t matter. Thankfully, happiness is a skill that can be cultivated, and it is entirely within our reach.
The hard truth is that we can’t please everyone, nor can we control the things that happen to us (all the time). It is impossible to live up to everyone’s expectations and it is impossible to achieve everything we desire exactly when and how we want. So there is no point in burning ourselves out in trying to do so since perfectionism is a destination wherein we will hardly ever arrive. The important thing, however, is that we make sure that one of the people we do please is ourselves!
– SaaniaSparkle 🧚🏻♀️