Your Journey, Not Theirs

“Comparison is the thief of joy”- Teddy Roosevelt

I have discovered that there is an infinite number of things and people upon which we can potentially compare ourselves to. And with how flooded we are by social media nowadays, it’s easier than ever to habitually find someone who seems to be living a “better” life than us, which only serves to make us feel miserable about ourselves. You have probably, at some point, felt the animosity boil in your blood, and your fists clenching by the envy surging up your brain. But the truth is, we have all been there! Unfortunately, once we drive down the road of jealousy, there is never an end.

Jealousy definitely plays a deadly role of stealing the joy from our lives, since we are continually tapering off our self-confidence in thinking that someone is better than us. But some times, we compare ourselves against inaccurate information. All of us show a part of ourselves to the outside world, with the other half remaining hidden forever, at least to the the common world. I mean, how many times have people asked us how we’re doing, when we’re having the day of our defeats and yet we bite our tongues and say, “everything is going great!”, when really, deep down we feel like a failure, or just about ready to lose our minds. The people we compare ourselves to are almost always enduring some struggles that we aren’t aware of. And so we typically compare the worst we know of ourselves to the best we presume about others. As Steve Furtick explains, “The reason why we struggle with insecurities is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.”

Comparing is also a losing battle. It puts us in a bubble of overwhelming emotions that make us feel burdened. We dwell upon our weaknesses and are so blindsided by them, that we forget about our strengths, powers, and achievements. We forget the fact that we are also unique in our own ways. And by falling into this ever-alluring trap, we seriously start to use others as a benchmark for our own worth. But no matter how hard we try to beat ourselves up, we can never become someone else, and we can never become perfect. Because the truth is, in this game of life, we never really reach a point where we have the ability to be better than others in every single way. We are humans, not flawless creatures.

We live our lives to pursue our dreams. Sometimes, however, some people will have better ways of doing things than we do. It’s easy to feel irked by that, but it’s also possible to take it under the best possible light to lift ourselves up, rather than flying off the handle over the fact that we think that they are better than us. Whenever my parents compare me to other people my age, I feel exasperated. I feel like they think that this person is better than me. But that isn’t true. As humans, we can become just so stubborn at times, that we fail to accept our weaknesses in front of others. Ruminating about how someone else is better looking, has more friends, or is more successful than us, is rather ineffective than to figure out or wonder why this is so and what we’re doing wrong. In fact, part of what makes life so amazing is learning from the talents of others to become better versions of ourselves. Besides, we don’t lose anything in trying to learn from others, only a whole lot of ego!

So, since comparison is the death of joy, let us try to keep in mind that nobody is perfect. All of us have great strengths and all of us are working along our weaknesses. And trust me, the freedom found in comparing less is entirely worth the effort!

-SaaniaSparkle 🧚🏻‍♀️

240 thoughts on “Your Journey, Not Theirs

  1. There’s so much wisdom in this post. I love it. I’m excited about your idea of learning from the talents of others to become better versions of ourselves. It’s genius!
    Fantastic post👍

    Liked by 3 people

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  3. I have exactly similar thoughts . As humans we are always comparing , grouping , distributing into categories . We are compared to peers , which if we analyse nobody is satisfied with what they have . The person who is coming last doesn’t want to be there , the average one doesn’t want to be average , the topper thinks he’s just topping the grade and not the entire zone and so on …but if considering our own past selves as the competition , it is fairer as we have similarities and in my opinion comparing the capability of a fish to swim to that of bird to flu is not fair . So why compare with others who have different strengths and weaknesses , compare your current to past and you’ll see tremendous growth …and that comparison will strive to make you best of you and that’s what one’s goal should be , being best of own self no others . Cause you are you

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Comparing people who are totally different in all aspects is just stupid. I feel that it lowers your self esteem and makes you feel super insecure, and it also exasperates you to no end. Great post, and I love how you’ve delivered your view on this annoying topic.

    Liked by 3 people

      1. haha thank you so much, i really appreciate the advice!! i have tried many times but it usually fails:( but thank you so much for replying, you’re one of the first people i’ve talked to on this platform!! 😊

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  5. Social media has definitely changed so many things. I work with teens and had a youth state to me: Lucy my phone…. well I am in a relationship with it and it’s a love/hate one. She also stated she had a hard time not having it by her bed and turning off her notifications. She explained gay she spends hours scrolling when really she stated she would rather read her book but her brain no longer able to concentrate on a book for more than an hour. It is so hard for many…. often times it’s a delusion of how perfect a life may look! So anxiety and depression is on the rise!
    Great post!!!

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