Fearing the future.

Feeling uncertain about the future and muddled up with the present…

I have quite often been there.

Worrying about what is going to happen next…

The prospect of not knowing if something good or bad will happen to me in the near future produces so much stress and discomfort.

Now the philosophical question comes, how to deal with it?

The number one thing that I have realised is that most of us worry ourselves with things that are most likely never going to happen, or basically that our worst fears will rarely ever come true. There are sure some situations that we think could adversely affect our lives, but usually even those aren’t life shattering. So we should ask ourselves what is the worst that could happen. Let’s take an example. Imagine that you are in a class of people. Look at the people around you and figure out what is the worst that’s happened to them. There will be things like this person got low marks in a test, or that person lost an important match. Generally speaking, there won’t be a person who has been kidnapped, or a person who has been diagnosed with a serious disease, or a person with a severe injury. For most of us, most of the time, life’s challenges are actually the small little things, which would hardly be relevant a decade from now. So after figuring all that out, drop the topic!

There would also be times where there is really nothing you can do about the future. I mean you can only do what you can today, and if there is nothing you can do about it, you are better off just going for a jog or taking a nap than worrying about things that are not even in your hands. There is actually a theory known as the circle of concern and the circle of influence. Letting go of things that are outside your circle of influence, and only focusing on things that you can control. For example, you can’t exactly control the traffic in Mumbai! But you can very well control your own behaviour and actions.

So for items you can control (things inside your circle of influence) , turn worries into work. For situations where you know for sure that you probably won’t achieve what you want to, there is no point in fearing about it. And I realised that working on it is the best antidote to worrying about it. Trying to make a better future by working on getting positive outcome for next time. This step takes a lot of courage to accept and do what you can, with what you have, and more importantly, believe you can face your fears to make a better future.

All that said, there will realistically be situations where your brain just refuses to be so logical and you feel that restlessness about what is going to happen. And that is where our dear old friend meditation comes in …

Meditation helps to stabilise us in the face of fear to help us understand it more clearly. With breathing and meditation, we can actually understand ourselves, our emotions and our fears, dig deeper into our thoughts and feelings.

So fear is a choice, you spend time worrying about it or you spend time understanding and getting over them…the choice is ours. 😊

– Saania Saxena

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109 thoughts on “Fearing the future.

    1. Hi,
      Nice to meet you here. Your surname brought back happy memories of my nursing days in u.k. I worked for 2 years on a long stay geriatric ward in n.h.s (don’t exist now since advent of private nursing homes) .
      The small hospital was like a big happy family and I like to think our patients were treated with the greatest respect and tender loving care.
      One of the consultants was called Dr Nayak and did his ward round on Fridays, a true gentleman.

      Liked by 4 people

      1. Wow! That’s amazing 😇I am happy that k brought smiles in your face! I am honored my friend 💐 Have a great New year ahead 🎄🍰🎶🍀🌿🌿💖💖🎶🎄💖🎄🎶💖🎶🍰🍰🌲🌿💖🍰🎄🎄🍰🍰🌲🍰🍰🎶🍀💖💖💖🎄🎶🎶🎄🎶🎶🎶💖🎄🎶💖🎶🍰🍰💖🍰💖🍰🎄🎄🍰🍰🎶🎄💖🍰💖🍰🎄🌲🎄🍰🎄🌲 cheers! May your all wishes fulfil in the year 2019…

        Liked by 2 people

  1. Wow! It’s not even funny with how much I stress on a daily basis and this just opened my eyes to how stress can take over your life. Thanks for reminding me not to stress about the little things and to look at the bigger picture! Btw, your writing is amazing!

    Liked by 6 people

      1. Definitely gone mad and family friend of ours and mum’s passed away the week before Christmas. Funeral delayed due to holidays. Need to revisit the circle also.
        Happy new tea to you & yours 👼

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I find the adage..”this too will pass” really helpful. If I can say it and easily believe it then its usually because my concern is something very transient and comparatively minor. Of course the phrase could apply to everything, but it helps me put things in perspective, particularly when i realise that in a week my concern will be irrelevant…and allows me to, not sweat the small stuff..😊

    Liked by 5 people

  3. Brilliantly put into words! I only recently came to this realization and it truly has made such a great difference. We can’t let worries of what’s not in our control consume us and drag us into a pit of worry & despair. It feels so much better to take action with what I can and to put anything I cannot on the back burner.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I appreciate your balanced prospective. The chart was a nice touch in showing how we can organize our thoughts. It reminds me of this scripture at Mathew 6:27 “Who of you by being anxious can add one cubit to his life span?”

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Great post and certainly true.
    I’m a firm believer in letting things outside my control alone and just focus on what I can control.
    Yoga helps that message become very clear. Thanks for the insight.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. This i was talking about, that we can’t expect anything from the future or control us, but we still planing future, but we dont do anything to have the future what we would love to have❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I love this! You are 100% right. We have the option to control, understand, and let go of our fears, or we can continue to dwell on them. Though dwelling on then does nothing but cause unnecessary worry and stress. Which, can lead to a number of physical problems as well (like stomach ulcers). Learning to control fear, especially through meditation, is such a powerful tool to help better one’s future. You are very wise, thank you so much for sharing your thoughts.

    Liked by 1 person

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